In order to enjoy our discussion, am going to divide a typical UNILAG night int three categories viz:
SMALL BOYS HOURS
BIGS BOYS HOURS
BIGGEST BOYS
Small boys hours starts from 7pm to about 8:30pm, small boys are the categories of guys that doesnt own a car and they are the first to call on their chick bearing in mind that their failure to arrive on time means that they may not be able to see the love of their life for that night.
The small boys are always seen in every strategic location very close to female hostels, you see them in front of kofo,queen amina,fagunwa,moremi,madam tinubu,honours hostel just to mention just a few,these categories of guys always put on their best dress or preferably their lattest dress just to make a statement that they are gradually arriving.
The small boys are always seen in every strategic location very close to female hostels, you see them in front of kofo,queen amina,fagunwa,moremi,madam tinubu,honours hostel just to mention just a few,these categories of guys always put on their best dress or preferably their lattest dress just to make a statement that they are gradually arriving.
I have had the opportunity of being part of them and I have a lot of friends in this category,therefore am talking from experience. Twenty minutes of standing in front of an hostel gate is what is required of a small boy to see his beautiful angel,usually part of this twenty minutes is used to call her on phone inorder to announce his arrival while the girl uses between ten to fifteen minutes asking her friends or even thinking alone whether to come out and see her 'toy' or not....... yes her 'TOY' because a guy in this category does not have any say at all over the girl and infact it is an understatement if I say the girl is just managing the guy out of pity or because the guy is hansome or brilliant or even maybe because the guy is foolish. Any way,my own greatest tool is to use the 'appeal to pity' method.
The twenty minutes over, the babe comes out with a fake smile often alone not accompany by any of her friends and the heart of the guy startys beating faster than normal,sometimes faster than the speed of light because he is not sure of where to take the babe to... but thank GOD and the authorities of UNILAG because inside UNILAG we have many love gardens where you can take your angel to, so most of the guys you see in the love gardens every night belong to this category of guys who want to express their love to an angel according to the dictates of their pocket.
Entertainment within the love garden is ver cheap because all you need to buy for the babe na one canned drink readily made available by the coca cola machines at strategic locations within the garden. Most of what we do inside the garden is to talk,talk and talk..... trying to convince the girl that one day soon we gonna make it,the angel often do the listening occassionally interupted by a brief smile,the girl is never nervous because most lof us in this category are gentle guys who will never want to do anything stupid except to talk,talk and talk as if we are a a wind bag not an orator.
OH! the saddest part of our own class of night is that it last only for 45mins or one hour at most often with a hug as a closing remark.What you have read above is only possible when the girl turns up but come to think about when the girl refuses to show up.... I once had that bad experience but am not willing to share it, so let me stop here because am afraid that the girl or a potential angel might be reading this write up.
Recall that this write up is about a typical UNILAG night,the next in line is the hours for the big boys which always starts around 8:30pm and reaches its peak around 9pm.
This class of guys move in groups often with a relatively new car either owned by the guy or owned by the entire group who normally contribute jointly to buy a second hand car that is still in shape, we call such cars COLLABO CAR. Alternatively it might even be a borrowed car i.e relatives car,family car or even dealer's car... dealer's car are cars that are up for sale using the guy as an agent of sales;such cars often have DLA as part of their plate numbers.
These category of guys often drive their cars in a NOTICE ME manner... they are accompanied by noise,speed and crowd and they always seem to be in a hurry while teir only destination is a favourite eatery in and around the town and afterwards return back to their boy's quarters with the girl obviously for some 'cooling off"
We call them 'PANA-SHARP-' guys,their mission is made easy by the girls who atre ready to follow a guy to any where as long as he has a car and some cash to dispense. Let me share one out of my numerous encounter with you: Sometimes ago some wher along the ever busy new hall hostels, I ran into a statinary car,the first sight of the car raises no eyebrow but because of my inquisitiveness, I had to take a second look at the car before I discovered that there were two love birds inside the car engaged in their business,they were totally carried away that they could'nt notice or should I say didn't bother to recognise that am a living thing probably they thought that I was a tree because I am tall and slim.
In conclusion,these bigs guys return their gadgets back to their hostel after they might have been done with them as if nothing HAPPENED.
In conclusion,these bigs guys return their gadgets back to their hostel after they might have been done with them as if nothing HAPPENED.
They are category three that should not be referred to as guys because they are men that are old enough to father the girls. Infact one of them is reading this write up now !
They are movers and shakers in Nigeria who sees UNILAG as a potential market,they are the type that comes around 10pm in tinted cars obviously to protect them from being easily recognised.
Please let me refer to them as contractors because most of them carry on their going concern on a contractual basis,they are contractors behind the scene only known to the girls and few of her trusted friends. The major market for this calibre of people is the new hall,they come in unannounced,alone without their drivers and if you are so lucky and vigilant you must have spotted some beautiful girls in their party dress waiting eagerly for their man friend. Upon his arrival,the girls move accross to greet him in expectations that their greetings will be rewarded with some new naira notes that belong to the category of ZUMA ROCK exchanging hands....that is the normal ritiual. Rituals completed,only one angel get into the car,waive to friends,close the door and off they go to their favourite HOTEL.
If you are here with me waiting for the girl to return this night,then you will have to wait till tomorrow when you will have the opportunity of seeing the angel return in a chartered cab.
If you are here with me waiting for the girl to return this night,then you will have to wait till tomorrow when you will have the opportunity of seeing the angel return in a chartered cab.
That as it may be,don't think that all of us in UNILAG are involved in this type of business,as a matter of fact apart from the suppliers(ANGELS) and the consumers(THE GUYS) we also have the ONLOOKERS: These are categories of people that only enjoys watching the drama as it unfolds every night,they are onlookers either because they are religious or they don't have the money and connections necessary to compete in that market or because thet are simply intimidated by whAt they see,they are the category that tells you THAT "THIS GUY IS CRAZY,THAT GIRL IS CRAZY, UNILAG IS TOO NOISY" instead of saying "UNILAG IS VERY LIVELY"
comments and reactions are welcome. write to
unilagpalava@gmail.comcomments and reactions are welcome. write to
CLICK HERE TO RETURN TO MAIN PAGE